Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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