You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
