So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
