I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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