Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
