yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
