Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
