i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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