Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
What a dumb baby whore.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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