I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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