New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
