Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
