No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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