I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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