Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
