Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
