That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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