totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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