I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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