I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
