Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
