I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
