Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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