thus making me awesome and them whores
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
