Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
