is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I will be naked everywhere
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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