my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
