dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
