What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
