I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize