so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Randomize
