I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
