he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
