When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
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