Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
