new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize