he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
