"it" just moved
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize