just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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