Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
you inspire me to be a worse person
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
