Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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