why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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