i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
