i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
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