life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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