if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
