My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I want you more than these girls want KFC
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize