i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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