whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
