please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
