ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
PANTIES FOUND
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